Reformed Grits

Don’t touch me
January 27, 2007, 8:48 pm
Filed under: Life

I just thought you all should know, I don’t like to be hugged.  People who know me well know this.  (Right Katie?  Right Caroline?)

I had the unique priviledge of accompanying the aforementioned Caroline on her very first Starbucks visit tonite with another friend Gayle and we were talking the usual girl-talk and discussing the tragedy in our church family this week and I don’t know how it happened but Gayle didn’t know this about me. 

Oh yes, yes, I remember.  We were talking about how Friday at school Jojo’s very sweet and emotionally sensitive teacher ran up to our pastor (who is not HER pastor but she knows him) and gave him a big ol’ bone-crushin’, Southern girl, "Praise God, I love ya!" hug.  Now anyone that knows our wonderful pastor knows…  He doesn’t hug.  Especially women.  And it’s for good reason… I’m sure he hugs his wife and daughter but not other women.   But she gave him NO OPTION!  And I just happened to be there and see it and she just didn’t know, bless her heart.  I had to giggle, frankly.  Kinda glad I got to see it.  Pastor Jeff, I’ve got your back… you had no say in the matter.  You looked kind of scared actually.  😀   

Because I’m not a hugger either.  I don’t like people touching me, and to be honest I know that sounds a little weird comin’ from a girl who’s been pregnant 7 times.  I’m good with the Mister huggin’ on me, if you must know, but even with my kids who I love to pieces I have to do a mental, "Hmmm Have I hugged Sugie today?  What about JD?" etc.  It feels very un-natural for whatever reason.  Weird, huh? 

Caroline recalled the time she accompanied me when I was in the ER for the zillionth time with kidney stones.  If you have ever had those little pieces of hell in your ureters you know you writhe and can’t keep still.  So I’m in a backless gown writing and moaning and hollerin’ and scarin’ folks and she’s sitting there and I can now look back and see the thoughts running through her mind like a stock-ticker running across her forehead.   "I think I should go hug her.  Or comfort her.  No, wait, she’s already in pain.  Do I make it awkward too?  Would I be hugging her to make her feel better or because I just feel so bad for her??"  I’m sure she was in pain too.  Seems like she patted me on the arm, like "There, there."  Yeah, that’ll do.

I am a true Southern girl.  A child of the South.  But I’m not ever in my life going to come runnin’ up to you and give you a big ol’ squeeze like all the stereotypes about us.  If you come up and hug me I’m likely to do a "Pastor Jeff" and stiffen like a board and pat you on the back.   

Don’t take it personally.  I’m just not wired that way.

You have been warned.      



7 Comments so far
Leave a comment

That won’t keep me from hugging you if I feel the need!!!

And BTW…I can’t believe y’all went to Starbucks without me.:-(

Comment by Andrea

Whew….I knew you had a blog in your head while we were sippin our yummies and I am glad this was it!

You know there are people in this world that hug all THE time. They hug anyone and everyone. They probably hug the Walmart cashier just because they want to. Your hugs are few and far between (none). That makes them kinda special. So if you ever decide that after all these years of friendship to give me a much deserved hug…you better hold on tight because I might just faint. 🙂

Until then…a pat on the arm will do. 😉

Comment by Caroline

I love hugs, but only from people I’m close too. And, it’s funny to imagine someone hugging Jeff. You can just tell he’s not a hugger! As I read your blog, all I could think was, “Have I ever hugged Kim? I don’t think so….” I’ll keep this in mind in case I ever get too emotional around you!

Comment by penny

Everytime I think I have you sorta figured out, you throw another zinger in there that makes me shake my head and laugh.
And, picturing Jeff’s reaction was pretty funny, too.

Comment by Gayle

Uh, oh. I think I have hugged you before!! I mean, I’ve just known ya too long not to ever have. But when I only see you once every three years or so, I can’t help it!! I just have to give you a big ‘ole squeeze. 🙂

Comment by Meg

I know a challenge when I read one…now YOU be warned. I may at any time, any place, hug you just to make you get used to it. I may even take bets as to how long it will take to get you used to them!! (HA, HA, HA she laughs evily!!)

Comment by Kristi`

I totally agree with Caroline. And since I live 6 hours away and hardly ever see you, I usually get one when I do!! 🙂

Comment by katester

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