Reformed Grits

It’s all gonna burn…
September 8, 2008, 10:10 pm
Filed under: Life

I have missed blogging.  I have missed having TIME to blog.  My day is full of trying to South Beach Diet (stomping foot in defiance), getting kids to school, living on a TIGHT budget, chasing Bee who is sweet but very curious and lonely while her 5 siblings are at school all day, attempting to be the school's bookkeeper in exciting but busy times (think building and growth), being soccer mom (and loving it and wishing that's all she had to do), trying REALLY hard to get back in to Wednesday night church, keeping up with laundry and not having stinky loads left for days (not to mention dishes and vacuuming.  I don't even wanna talk about my bathrooms because it's just not happening), fighting headaches (I'm doing better), and chasing down my beloved so we can squeak out some time together, just to breathe. 

I like to write.  I love to entertain you and make you laugh.  It's depressing to me that I can't be here for you.  :-)  Have y'all watched that show "Wipeout?"  Have you seen how they have to do certain obstacles while running on an increasingly fast treadmill?  They keep up for a while but very frequently they fall on their backsides and get dragged away to a pit of… failure.  I'm on the treadmill for sure, and I have conquered many obstacles.  But I fear what's coming.   I have never learned to juggle.  And not while I'm running.  I would love a life of simplicity.  Does it exist?  I can't give up healthy eating; the kids must go to school; doing anything but living carefully on cash is not an option; Bee will grow up too soon and needs the companionship of her mommy; the job must be done so my kids can stay in their fantastic school; we have to have clean clothes; headaches are out of  my control; NOT chasing my beloved is not an option.  The only thing with wiggle is Wednesday night church, and we are committed to helping in a new capacity which we are very excited about.  That's something we really would LIKE to do.  Oh, and breathing is important too.   There are too many things to mention that I'm NOT doing that I WANT to do… like actively helping mom find a house; visiting my grandparents and helping them; volunteering with my kids' classes; discipling some of the youth.  It goes on and on.  If I were spread any thinner I'd be invisible. 

This isn't a complaint; it really isn't.  All these things make my life RICH or bring rich rewards (like my job).  (Well, except the headaches.)   I want to cry or laugh at people who tell me I must be organized to have six kids.  If they only knew, they'd feel a lot better about themselves. 

I miss blogging.  I miss sewing (I have so many projects underway it's not even funny).  I miss being with my friends.  I miss… sugar and bread. 

I was well-reminded last Wednesday (when we went to church!  YAY!) that this is not our home.  It's all gonna burn.  I can't tell you how often Mr. G and I say that.  Usually in frustration when something we care about gets destroyed.  It's ALL gonna burn.  Except those things which will last forever.   I hope I've made good choices about how to spend the time I have and the money that flows through our hands.  

Now go and be depressed by this boring, depressing post!  Sorry!  We must laugh at me soon.  I'll be working on that.  (Better to laugh at me than for me to laugh at you!) 


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